Friday, September 2, 2011

RIP Bread.

Well, it's happened. My first real PB (productive burping)/puking experience. This WILL be TMI for some people, so you if you don't like detailed accounts of puking, you may want to skip this post.

Firstly, I knew there would come a point in time where there would be things I could not eat (I dare say, I counted on it). Sadly, that thing is bread - at least the center bits of yummy Panera french bread.

Last Friday, the hubby and I went to Panera for dinner (I <3 Panera!) and I got the mac&cheese with a hunk of bread (because how good does bread dipped in cheese sound?). I know, I know. WHERE IS YOUR PROTEIN ERIN?! Apparently my band felt the same way. I ripped up my hunk of bread and mindlessly took a large bite of the yummy, gooey center bits from the bread. And I even told myself, "That was a big piece...better chew it really well!" Well, apparently I got too excited about it and did not chew or swallow as well as I should have. Almost immediately I was hit with a terrible pain/pressure in my chest. So I sat there for a few seconds willing this stupid bite of bread to go down. I. Was. Majorly. Stuck. I couldn't swallow spit or water. It sucked. After about 5 minutes of trying to swallow spit and will it down, I realized that was NOT happening. I could feel that stupid hunk of bread s-l-o-w-l-y work its way back up my esophagus. So I excused myself and went to the bathroom (YAY for public toilets!....not).

I stood in the stall for a while, spitting out the spit and mucus that wouldn't go down. I wasn't sure what to do really. I'm not one of those people that can put my finger in my throat to throw up. I get my hand to my face and I go "Uhhh ahhhh NO!" Can. Not. Do! So I kept spitting, and spitting, ....and spitting and finally I felt the bread closer to my throat and I wretched a few times and this gross wad of mucus and bread came out! It was disgusting, to say the least. It also wasn't done! I had to do that a few more times before I felt better. I think the rest of it went down.

So after that, I had lost my appetite and I was really upset with myself for being so stupid and knowingly taking that big of a bite of BREAD. What was I thinking? (Besides OMG YUMMY BREAD.) I was afraid to eat anything again until about 2 hours later.

Well, the next morning, we went to Bob Evans before going out of town and I had an egg, some sausage and some toast. I thought, "Hey, I can do toast. It's dry. I won't take big bites. And can't have a fried egg without toast!" Well, I threw some egg on the toast and took a WAY TOO BIG BITE AGAIN. As soon as I got stuck I was so mad at myself. Did I really just do that AGAIN? Yep, sure did. This time, it hurt worse and took longer to get rid of! It was awful.

Needless to say, I will not be eating bread anymore unless it is crust and very small bites! I am very saddened by this. I love(d) bread. :( Le sigh. Farewell will be missed.

In other news, that Biggest Loser workout killed me. Literally. My legs still hurt 3 days after I worked out and then on Saturday I bent down to go under a rope and I pulled my left hamstring. Ow. That shizzz hurts. My legs didn't start feeling okay after that until about 2 days ago. I have also been working overtime every night this week and it has pretty much halted anything else I do after work (ie - exercise). In my defense, I am about to start packing my house to move and working as much OT as possible so I can afford it! (PS, trying to get a loan for a house is PAIN IN MY ARSE.) Busy, busy times for this bandster.


  1. RIP Bread! Sadness. Bread is yummy, but puking in restaurants is not! It sounds like a really painful experience.

    FYI, I looooovvee TMI posts!! hehe :] xoxoxo

  2. LoL - I'm with Amanda! TMI posts make it much more real. Please, think of all the people who are like "ZOMGZ! I want lap band!! XD Lose weight, no work!" and then they read your post and think, "That sounds way worse than exercise.. maybe I should think about this". Ya know? You're saving uneducated masses. lol

    As far as bread goes.. maybe you should cut it up before you eat it? I know that sounds *ridiculous* but SEEING the small bites before putting them in your mouth might help. However, I can imagine avoiding bread altogether after your experiences... yick!

    Keep up the good work, chica!! Proud of you :)